This blog post was first published at our sister site http://intensivecarehotline.com a resource and support website for Families who have a loved one critically ill in Intensive Care. The website and its resources helps Families of critically ill people to instantly improve their lives!
Hi, it’s Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM with another weekly update!
Let’s face it. 99% of Families who have a loved one that’s critically ill in Intensive Care are not well positioned and not well prepared mentally. And why are they not well positioned and well prepared mentally? Because Families who have a loved one that’s critically ill in Intensive Care tend to be overwhelmed, stressed, completely thrown out of their comfort zone and they are at the mercy of the Intensive Care team.
Worst of all, they believe they have no or little control over the situation and that’s exactly what puts them in a very bad mental state. And being in a bad mental state is not helpful in your and your critically ill loved one’s situation!
So, how do you change this difficult situation, turn it all around and get you and your Family in a strong and healthy mental state? I put together 3 quick action steps that will help you to position and prepare yourself well mentally so that you can deal with whatever this difficult situation is throwing at you!
Are you ready?
1. Put yourself and your needs first!
Sounds counterintuitive doesn’t it? It is counterintuitive, but success in any endeavour in life often depends on counterintuitive moves! I see too many Family members of critically ill Patients in Intensive Care putting their needs last, only to find that they try and spend day and night in Intensive Care to be with their critically ill loved one! If you find yourself doing this, you’ll be running out of steam and stamina quickly and you are not doing your critically ill loved one a favour. Your critically ill loved one can feel your vibes and he or she can feel, that if you feel well and you have been looking after yourself, will make them feel good as well! Your critically ill loved one can feel your positive vibes coming from you and if you don’t put yourself first, you can’t give back to other people!
2. Stop thinking that you are at the mercy of the Intensive Care team
I see far too often that Family members of the critically ill take everything they get told by the Intensive Care team for face value and Families don’t question and they don’t question enough! Intensive Care team members, whether doctors or nurses are highly clinically skilled people, but that doesn’t mean that they always know what’s best or that they are always doing the right things. Also, keep in mind that any Intensive Care Unit and the hospital is a highly political institution, where decisions are often made in the light of politics!
A lot of Families also think that the Intensive Care team has a lot of power and that therefore they can’t question decisions. You need to stop doing that and you need to start seeing yourself as equals to the Intensive Care team! After all it’s your loved one who’s critically ill and you need to have the mental positioning and preparedness to help you through this situation!
3. Stay positive no matter what
Staying positive is critical for you, your Family and for your critically ill loved one. The reality is that the Intensive Care team is often taking a more negative outlook for the well being of your critically ill loved one. The reason for that is that they don’t want you to get any false hope and they also want to protect their professional reputation in case things don’t turn out well. You need to counteract their positioning, by defining your positioning and your positioning can only be a positive positioning! Stay positive, don’t give up and make up your own mind about things! In this day and age, where information is easily accessible you can get as much good information as you like and you can easily counterbalance the Intensive Care teams positioning with your positioning!
If you have any questions, send me an email to [email protected]
This is Patrik Hutzel from INTENSIVECAREHOTLINE.COM and I’ll see you again next week with another update!